Storms will come

   12    
6

I saw this couple in traffic fight this morning. Guy looked mid thirties. Chick didn’t look a day older than 25, but it’s hard to tell nowadays with make-up and Botox. Traffic was stagnant as you would expect at 8am. They were in a nice red Subaru Outback (that’s how I noticed em in the first place). It’s been raining like mad, and so most cars in traffic are somewhat dirty, but this Subaru was spitshine-clean which could mean either two things; they are married, and they have a live-in maid who wakes up early in the morning to clean the car. Or it could mean they are just dating and living together (or chick spent over) and he’s one of those guys who wake up early in the morning to clean their cars. It’s hard to certify people’s status in traffic.

But they were fighting. Bitterly.

When most couples fight in traffic it’s always the silent one. The one where the woman turns to the man and says something totally acerbic and curt then turn and look away. Or where the man stares at the woman long and hard and then mumbles something sarcastic but very hurtful. But these couple was really going for the jugular. Or rather the chick was.

The car had no tint, but the windows were all rolled up, that means it was like watching a Mexican soap on mute. She was very agitated; I could tell her voice was raised because her mouth opened wide every time she spoke. Veins popped from her neck. Her jaws were drawn tight and her eyes looked murderous. She spoke in the guys face, and she wanted to stress something she wagged a finger in his face.

But here is how the man fought her; by not fighting her. He stared ahead, hands on the wheel. If the chick asked something (I could tell because it’s the only time her mouth stopped moving and she stared at him expectantly) he would say something brief, all while he continued staring ahead – at the back of a dirty lorry carrying goods from Kinangop of some place like that. She only took a brief break from the tirade to flip open a make-up thingi and powder her nose. He seemed to be accustomed to the chick’s anger because he seemed too calm about it, almost sympathetic and accommodating towards her. They chick didn’t seem to draw him out. He seemed like had stepped out of the car and left an effigy of himself there to face her vitriol. He seemed like he didn’t care anymore how hard she shouted or even if she poked his eye with her nails, which by the way, seemed very well manicured; long and strong. The type of nails that can remove your esophagus.

But perhaps that’s how they fought, I figured. Perhaps that was normal to them, all that angst and shouting and nails and make-up kit. Maybe if they watched another couple fight by talking silently, they would be shocked at their lack of passion. or maybe that’s how he started his day on most days by getting an earful. Or maybe he had reached the end of the tether with her and didn’t care anymore what she said or how she said it.

I wondered what the man did so early in the morning to warrant that venom. Maybe he had rocked up home at 5am, but that’s unlikely because he didn’t look hangied. He looked crisp and daisy in his white shirt and yellow tie. Or maybe while they dressed that morning she had asked him if she looked fat (she didn’t look fat, but women will ask you such questions any way) and he had said the wrong thing. Hell there is no right answer to that fat question.  Or maybe she was mad because a woman called him early in the morning. Yeah, that can get a woman going all right. Or maybe it was a spillover fight from the previous night, yes, women can really drag you in the mud for days on end if they put their minds to it. Either way he had done something wrong and his ass was in the doghouse. I loved his car, I really did, but I was so glad I wasn’t seated in it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

6
12 Comments
  1. Looks could be very deceiving most of the time. A very nice Subaru Outback and the occupants are a sad lot and am sure they dont even enjoy the ride. They dont even soak in the knowledge that everyone else is noticing and appreciating a clean good car on a rainny muddy morning…… What a pity!

    By the way Biko, how did you notice the lady’s veins stretching from her neck? yet the windows were not open?

    Am glad i walk to work……

  2. Karuu,

    Hang on, i dont think you would conclude that they were unhappy. I think like everybody else they were having a bad day, which has got nothing to do with the Subaru even the weather. The car in this context is irrelevant.

    but I saw her veins becoz they had no tint, and i was like wat, less than two meters away?

  3. Biko,

    First off, the reason why your dude looked suave on a morning like today’s after yesterdays downpour; where the only people still looking daisy n sassy are those with tumble-dryer washing machines, unlike the rest of kenyans who have to light up a jiko every evening to dry the clothes ?? is yes, that vein-popping-mouth-opening-tongue-lashing-venon-spewing-woman in the car! So lets give some credit where its due

    Second, the dude, being level-headed, heck! that’s how he acquired such a nice ride, ofcourse had the sense not to look in her direction cuz 1) he treasures his looks. If her talons were as lethal as you say… best keep looking forward.. esp if she’s just a chic he could tire off and discard… 2) Even you Biko, would look ahead. You know men are all about machismo… he must have been wary of who’s looking in their direction… His wandering eye could have caught a half doz. women in rides nearby who had checked him out – therefore he was not about to look like a she-male, screeching back at his gal heck no! or 3) Maybe she’s just grown on him.. and he’s grown tired of the tantrums and he’s built his defence mechanism that works.

    But then again, why would any man put up with this… why ride a nice ride which makes females line up for you – and put up with such. Is it the sex or just kamuti? Some guys also get off on arguments you know?

  4. Biko i like an Outback too. Lol! shit can be crazy sometimes when a woman starts being mad at you the most thing you can do is just being silent, thats best weapon for them.

  5. Biko,

    For a guy to just look straight up and not even seem to notice the lady’s tantrums, chances are he is so used to that all the time. Therefore i assume they are unhappy

    And again, its high time ladies we learnt to avoid washing our dirty soiled linen in public……..

    @ Kweheria,
    I would concur with your 3rd opinion whereby the guy has built his defence mechanism so well

    Some women can reaaallly bug a guy and you only pity the dude in question here

  6. I think men in serious annoying relationships get huge ass cars to cover up the pain and heartache they get from nagging women. Its like retail therapy for women!
    Then car will service you do what you want without complaining. And most of all is not yelling at you for hours in traffic!

  7. I think men in serious annoying relationships get huge ass cars to cover up the pain and heartache they get from nagging women. Its like retail therapy for women!
    The car will do what you want without complaining. And most of all its not yelling at you for hours in traffic!

  8. @Kweheria….i too would look str8 ahead…coz one the powder lands on ur face u cant see then the talons are unleashed n off she leaves u in the car writhing in pain… i wud look str8 ahead!!! n anyway the best treatment to someone who is yellin at u is to kip silent let them rant n rave n let it all out n when they come down maybe u can have a decent conversation..

  9. Oh man, biko. You didn’t know the difference between ‘this’ and ‘these’ back then. Hahaha, sorry I just had to, grammar nazi here. :’)