Wild Goose Chase


He was seated at the Intercontinental Hotel’s Poolside Bar nursing a scotch. This was the tail-end of 2014. He was with an MCA lady friend who he’d known for dog’s years. “He will be here,” she said unperturbed as she brought her merlot to her lips. It was about to knock 7pm and the man they were waiting for – a politician – was running slightly late. They were waiting for the man because he needed to borrow thirty million shillings from the man.


At only twenty seven years he already owned two houses in Kiambu Road; in Edenville and Thindigwa. He had already quit a job in the energy sector a year before because he was making so much dosh he thought, screw this, I can make this dough on my own. So he had quit and his MCA pal, his homegal, had had the governor hook him up with a licence for operating the business and he had put up a shingle and gone ahead to make such “stupid money” in under a year.


There are chaps who come out of university with First Class Honours but once they land on the streets they can’t make a move because there is no coursework to be done in the streets, no term papers, just street smarts. And because no university teaches you to be street smart, these chaps drown in the city’s concrete because their street instincts are as sharp as the colour grey. He wasn’t one of those chaps. He was sharp, yes, a chemical engineer by education but also a street hustler by blood. He was shrewd. He thought on his feet. He loved numbers but unlike most people who loved numbers, he connected the dots with them. And he made money.


The MP came. An MP from western, easy going guy, terrible suit. He ordered a shot of Johnnie Blue. The guy knew because he picked the bill after. You don’t want to know how much a shot of Johnnie Blue costs in a hotel bar. It will cause you indigestion.


They got down to business. He sat all the way back because men with money sit back. They are the bride and you want their hand. The man explained his business model: I buy this from these guys at this amount, I sell it to these other guys at this amount. There is an opportunity here to also get into the market. I have contacts there and if we do  this we can make much much more. Problem is, I don’t have that capacity to scale up. I need 30 million for this. The MP guy liked the idea but he was also a businessman. He asked questions. Eventually they agreed that the MP would give him the 30m but he would want him to pay back 5m in his account every end month and a further 2m per month for his trouble. That’s 7m every end month. The MP also wanted 51% shares in his company until he repaid the 30m after which they would go 50-50 shareholding. “I didn’t care. I was still going to be making so much money,” he said. They touched glasses. The following week a lawyer came bearing a contract. The 30 million landed in his account the following day. Then the MP never bothered with him. He trusted him to pay back. They started making money. In 6 months he had paid him back his 30m plus interest. The office grew to 22 staff in three towns, the lowest being paid 70k a month. More money started rolling in. He was young, he was smart, he was making stupid money. Life was good.


Now, what good is a story like this without a chick, ey?


They had met in uni, she was two years behind him. Hot number. Mad love. When she finished, she couldn’t get a job. He was rolling in it, so he kept her comfortable. When he bought his second house, he registered it under both their names and they moved in together. “My first mistake,” he says. He bought her a car; a Mercedes. She was a balling housewife, but a frustrated one, “because she really wanted to get a job.” So he took her back to school to do her masters. They were travelling all over. His relationship with the MP got closer. “ He was such an easy partner to work with. He never cared about the nitty gritties so long as money was coming in. He let me run the show,” he says. “Fridays our people would work half day and so he would come to the office with a bottle of his favourite expensive whisky together with one of his politician friends and he would tell them, ‘Kujeni muone kijana Mkikuyu ananitengenezea pesa nikikaa tu starehe.” They would drink the whole afternoon.


In 2016 his wife got pregnant (They had moved in together).  In 2017 she got a job and a baby girl.


“One day the MP calls me and says we need to meet. Come to Sankara. So si I go,” he says. “We meet at the Gallery bar. He’s with two serious-looking gentlemen, black Americans I learnt later. I’m not a suit guy but I know a good suit when I see one and those guys were wearing serious suits. The MP tells me about the proposal these guys have. It’s tied to another political bigwig and it involves 10 billion if done right. He needed to raise 3 billion and he said he needed 112 million from the company, which is all the money we had. That would mean closing down the business. We talked late into the night. I asked for time to think about it, which I did for days. I talked to my father and he said that I should understand that a politician is a politician at the end of the day. I did my math and it seemed like a great risk to take. I stood to make 500 mic from this deal and with that I could invest the money in a fixed deposit account and sit back. Plus he told me that he had trusted me with 30m when I really needed it, and it was time I also trusted him. I didn’t have a reason not to. We had had a great relationship. So I paid all staff three months advance and told them that we would call them after three months. Then I signed away the money.”


Well, elections happened in 2017, and this deal was based on that election. They lost. Shit hit the fan. The MP collapsed and was hospitalised. They lost all their money. He was left with only 700K in his account. When he told his wife she flipped. “She said I was finished. That I was done. That I was foolish to trust a politician,” he says.


He had to sell his first house and other property to stay afloat. “Because I would undercut other dealers in price I couldn’t go back and deal. I was in a position where I was losing money daily and getting frustrated quickly while my wife’s star seemed to be rising. She got a promotion, she was travelling for work and she was drinking a lot. I was drinking a lot.”


Then his money ran out. “There is no path to broke-ness. It just happens and it happens differently to different people. If you had told me two years before then that I would be broke I would have told you that you are crazy. I didn’t imagine I would ever be broke in my life. My wife was slowly losing respect for me and it was frustrating me. She was travelling for work a lot, or what she said was work and always ‘hosting clients’. She would taunt me about the decision I made and taunt me for my lack of means. I was shocked because I was there for her when she had nothing. I had to sell my LandCruiser at some point and borrow her car, which I had bought but she would not allow me. She would come home drunk at 3am and not want me to ask her anything. So I put a tracker on the car and I would see her hop from one location to the next.”


The fights started. Physical fights. Drunken late night fights.  She would come home and find him high on vodka, the only drink he could afford, and she would be drunk too and they would start abusing each other and fighting until the neighbours came. Things got worse.


“I would not leave the house. I would stay in my room drinking the whole day. I was frustrated and broke. I would not leave my bed, I’d just lie there drinking,” he says. “She moved from our room and started sleeping in the downstairs bedroom. I started to hate her. She hated me. There was so much hate in the house. Hate, physical fights and emotional abuse on both sides. One day she came home drunk as usual and came to my room and started abusing me, so I hurled her against the wall. I remember punching her in the face like you would punch a man, several times, and she was screaming and shouting that I was killing her. The cops came. I was thrown in the cell. I think I was thrown in the cell three times and she four times. She always told me that one day she would kill me. And she tried. One day when I had blacked out she came home and hit me over the head with a gin bottle. I woke up confused, wondering if I had spilled vodka in my bed. Kumbe it was blood. See the stitch here?” He shows me a scar on his skull.


“Cops were a common sight in our house. They would tell us to just break up because one day one of us would die. There is a cop who even tried counselling us. Nothing. I couldn’t leave the house because I was broke. She refused to leave because she was part owner. So the fights ensued.”


Then she started bringing men home. Random men.


“The first time she brought a man home, it was a strange, man,” he says. “I had woken up in the morning and of course she was not in bed because she would come home so drunk she would crash downstairs in the spareroom. As I went downstairs I saw a man leaving the spare room to go to the water dispenser. I was shocked and confused! I just stood there looking at him. He was a big, tall man. Very big guy. I thought I was dreaming. He went and got water from the dispenser and as he made his way back he saw me and he didn’t even act surprised. I said, ‘Hey, who the hell are you and what are you doing in my house?’ He barely broke his stride as he replied and I will never forget his words, he said, ‘You are the one in the wrong place, I was invited by the owner of the house.’ Then he just went into the bedroom!”


“Whaat!” I say.


“I know. I didn’t even know what to do. By this time my self esteem was so low I was taking a lot of shit man. I asked her about him the following day and she said it was her house too.”


“Were you guys intimate at this time?”




She started bringing men over at 3am. He would hear them walking in drunk, whispering loudly, the bedroom door opening and closing.  “I would feel so small. So insulted. So worthless. At some point I accepted this behaviour, amazingly. I stopped caring. I was drinking so much. Once the help was done with the knives and forks I would lock all the knives in my room because she promised to kill me.”


One night she came home with this particular guy she liked. He had blacked out on the sofa in the living room so he heard them open the gate. He was drunk. He got up and as they opened the door, he told the guy to bugger off. “I had had enough, I wanted to save what was left of my manhood. There was shouting. I hit this man with a wheel spanner. He drew a gun on me, in my house! Anyway, I got his car’s number plate and searched for him, got his name. He’s one of your media guys.”


“What’s his name?” I ask. He tells me a name I’ve never heard.


He then started stalking him on Facebook. He found his wife and sent her a message. They met. “I had become that petty but I wanted this man to pay. I hated how he disrespected me in my own house, how he made me feel helpless. I was angry and I wanted to hurt him. I told his wife everything. The wife was one of those crazy ones. She was pissed off. You know what she did? She went to my wife’s office and caused a major stink. It was ugly.”


Her drinking got worse. He wished her dead. He wished she would crash and die in the car while drunk. “Every time my phone would ring from an unknown number I hoped it was the police calling me about her death.” He even went to Eastleigh to find cyanide but he was told it was 200k which he didn’t have.


On 9 January at 1:11am he sent me an email for the first time. I try not to check my emails after 8pm until 8am the following day because emails can sometimes just depress the hell out of you. This time I don’t know why I checked my email when I woke up, just before my run. It was a sad email, maybe even drunken. An email of disappointment and frustrations. He said he wanted to tell his story. He finished by saying, FYI, she just walked in with a man as I type this. Let me know if you want to hear this story. I said sure, of course. Then silence.


“I was drinking daily and heavily. I had lost weight. I couldn’t leave the house or my room. Then one day I said, you know what, this woman won’t kill me. So I moved to Nanyuki, where I had some property. I would come to Nairobi on Fridays to see my daughter. She was always drinking.”


One day he was in a bar drinking in Nanyuki with a guy he barely knew when he got a call. The guy on the phone mentioned his wife’s name and asked him whether he knew her. He said they have a child together. The man said, “You might want to come over; she is dead. Road crash.”


“I told him that there are emergency numbers on the windscreen, they belong to her relatives and that he should call one of them. The man was shocked. He said, ‘I’ve just told you that the mother of your child is dead and you want me to call her relatives?’ I hung up and the man I was drinking with asked me why I looked so happy and I said, ‘My wife is dead.’”


“Who called you?” I ask.


“I don’t know. Just some random guy.”


I sit back and he continues with the story even though I’m now distracted because his story now has three holes. I suspect strongly that he’s lying. His daughter is now roaming in the bar. We talk for another hour. I pay the bill, thank him and I leave. In the car I went over his story in my head and thought there was something that didn’t sit right with that guy. This was Sato. Sunday I wake up and start writing his story and at some point I stop because what use is writing a story when your hunch is that it’s based on lies? I go back to his first email he sent me reaching out. Then I read the second email.


On that email dated 6 Feb, written at 12:15am he had mentioned that he got the call of her death from one of the men his wife used to bring home. On his earlier email there was no mention of him hitting the man who his wife brought home, with a wheel spanner. Or of cops. Then there was the general aura he exhibited. His body language. How he occupied space. He didn’t come out as a genuine person. These things had bothered me a little, but I ignored them because you can’t judge people harshly the first time you meet them. Normally I do basic background check to see if basic things check out. Yes, some people might embellish somethings as you would expect but I can’t control that. But I try to make sure that people don’t come posing as their alter-ego, blowing smoke up my ass, feeding me grass.


Anyway, I start digging. I call Ivory, who I work with now and who has worked in agency for a while, and I ask her if she knows anyone at The Agency* and if she knows if a chic called X works there. [His alleged wife].


“Why?” she asks suspiciously.


“Something I’m trying to confirm.”


She calls me moments later and says, “Nope. There is nobody by that name at The Agency*.”


“How many guys did you ask?”




“Can you ask two more people?”


“The f*k for?” She’s a bit of a sailor, Ivory. “If you are going to make me ask questions on a Sunday about this chic you have to let me know why.”


“I want to find out if she’s dead,” I say.




“Yeah. In fact ask if anybody who worked for The Agency* has died this year, February.”


Meanwhile I send feelers out to my contacts in agencies to look for lady X. Nobody has heard of her. I google her. Nothing.


Ivory calls me ten minutes later and says I’m chasing a ghost. Nobody from The Agency* has died this year from a road accident or any other form of death. I tell Ivory the story and she says, wait a minute, someone mentioned some story that sounds familiar but the name you mention is different. So we run his number on TrueCaller and his real name comes up and it doesn’t match the name on his email, which is Lawrence. I go on FB and I see his picture, which was the same picture he had as his Whatsapp profile earlier in the year. I realised later that the names he gave me for his alleged deceased wife were shortened names but also names that appear on ID but which she didn’t use officially.


In short, it turns out that this man wasn’t even married to lady X. And lady X isn’t dead. He had turned the story around, demonised this woman in his story. We later traced the protagonist, the man who lady X was allegedly bringing into his house. It was all so disturbing. But one thing was clear; he was giving me a cock and bull story, sending me on a wild goose chase. I sat there and thought, but why would anyone spin this elaborate lie? What could possibly be his motivation?


So I called him and I could hear the daughter crying in the background. I told him I wanted to ask him a few questions. That must have set off his alarm because he promised to call me back but he never did. He Whatsapps me 15 mins later and says the baby is asleep. I say good, call me then. He says, no, we can chat. I ask him what his name is and he gives me his email name. I tell him actually that’s not you name, your name is so and so. He gives me more bull about that being his grandfather’s name etc. I ask him what his wife’s name is again, he refuses to tell me. I ask him if she worked at The Agency* when she died and he says, actually she moved to a place in South B. I ask for the name, he says he can’t remember. I tell him that X wasn’t his wife, that she is his baby momma. And she isn’t dead. I send him a picture of her and his daughter and ask if those people look familiar. He says, “Let’s leave the story then.” I say but we can’t just leave the story, you need to admit that you lied. I need to know why you would lie about something like this, make me understand as a fellow man, why you would wish death to the mother of your own child. I’m giving you a chance at common decency here.


“She isn’t dead but she’s dead to me,” he writes. I tell him it isn’t cool at all, this wild goose chase he sent me on. I was honestly shocked at how someone can voluntarily email me and lie so elaborately about his story, his own truth. And to make matters worse, drag his own daughter to this elaborate theater of deceit and use her – his own innocent blood – as a prop to his grand deception. It takes a special kind of human being to do something like this, a pathological liar, someone lower than a douchebag.


I have done interviews for close to close to ten years now, and often I can flag discrepancies in a story because the devil is in the details and most people don’t care for details even though that’s where the story is. Whilst I will confirm the basics by doing a rudimentary background check I can only do so much to corroborate your story. I realise that people can be prone to exaggeration and hyperbole and this is fine, but fundamentally you should respect the truth because it’s yours. If you meet me to try and feed me wild fiction you are not only disrespecting my work, you are disrespecting yourself and guys who come here to read that story.


This blog is not a tabloid. We are here to be stimulated, to be entertained and intellectually provoked. The point of Men and Marriage is to open up as men, to share our stories about marriage with the hope of learning from each other, as men. We are not here to bash women or settle domestic scores or wash our sins. The conversation here is  based on emotional honesty.


Fundamentally, we are all flawed as men. We come with great baggage and limitations, but eventually we have to strive to be better human beings by willing to not only see our flaws in other men but also try and correct them but also learn from them.  If we can’t be honest with ourselves as men, then how can we be honest to women?




We have about five stories left then I close Men and Marriage and embark on Women and Marriage. This is the final call if you want to tell your story. Also, yee happily married men who have been married over 9-years, I’d love to hear your stories. Kindly email me on [email protected]

Registration for the 19th Writing Masterclass is now open. It will be – tentatively – on June 5th to 7th. To lock down a slot kindly email [email protected]

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      1. Come slow on me sebho. I mean no harm. I was only going for this imaginary trophy we all pretend not to want. Life is hard enough. Turn on the easy Switch. On the real though, Tuesday is about Biko’s reading so that’s a good thing. As he says” We are here to be stimulated, to be entertained and intellectually provoked. ” Live and let live.

          1. Wow. This story had me on the edge of my seat only for out to turn to be fictional. Was already thinking of grief counseling for him but anyhuuuu to each their own.

          2. There is never help for a liar,all he needs is to accept the truth .Lying is a disease and the only cure is acceptance of the truth and acknowledge it.Awache kuenjoy watu ,worst of it anapi manisha Biko
            [who does that],People should stop playing the victim all the time,
            Lol on the flip side tho,this reminded me of movie za D.J [If you know you know]

          3. Men and marriage is quickly approaching its end and our hearts are forlorn following this news.
            However, we get pretty raved up for the upcoming women and marriage for in it we explore the two sides of the same coin. Biko, in this you bring to us the fulfillment of… “With every ending comes a new beginning ”
            I can hardly wait!!!!

          4. Honesty is the best policy. I wish the guy would have been sincere. The story was just getting good

        1. I feel he has replayed his baby mamas death so much that if it doesn’t happen naturally he might end up doing it himself.

    1. While some details were fuzzy and questionable, I never outrightly suspected it to be a lie until Biko pointed it out. And I think this is a credit to Biko’s work because we come with our guard down to just read a story.
      This dude should be ashamed of himself.

      1. I still got arrested only disappointed that he lied.For what exactly though?I am not judging but this Man seemed to have played this story in his head over and over that he believes it too.Anyway waiting for women and Marriage.

      2. Thank you for clarifying Biko. We all have flaws but honesty about them is needed before change can begin. This series on men and marriage has given me an awesome insight into the male psyche that defies understanding at times..

    1. I couldn’t agree more. I had never felt so sorry for a character, only to find it’s some grown *** man just seeking attention.

    2. Am i the only one who felt something was off from the start? Just me? Ok

      Good one Biko for doing a back ground check

      1. This kastoro felt off from the start,at 27 and he has all that am like Gosh wassup with my life yo!
        And then a politician gives a person 30Mil,hao siyo wa Kenya Walahi tena.
        But well, he should stop watching too much serieses and get help he could be schizophrenic.

      2. It already had some red flags….at 27 borrows someone you have never met 30 million…then the 50-50 thinh yet you will repay the loan…then the thing about a lady bringing men to the house- especially that one…seemed very bizarre…like a man walking confidently to the dispenser in another man’s house…then the wishing dead part then it happens…initially at the start i was like okay buh hapo different men daily to the house unajua tu ni BS…am glad Biko clarified….i wouldn’t live with myself

    3. I guess he could be in need of help.He’s mentally broken and bitterness is eating him up.To such extend of lies,he’s even a risk to the daughter. Thank you biko for your valuing your readers.

  1. Well well well, what a twist of events,
    That jamaa definetely needs help, the strength it took him to come up with such a well woven lie and consistently keep up with it astounds me.
    On the flip side, what’s the baby momma’s story now that he led us into listening to one story line?
    Most of all i’m glad the truth stood out.
    Great read as always!

  2. This is an absolutely heartbreaking piece from beginning to end.

    I was already sympathetic to the deplorable state the guy and his wife lived in the fictitious tale but then it got worse just learning a whole male human could go out of their depth to make up such a lie.

    It is not only disrespectful to you Biko but to the entirety of people that opened up their lives so that the rest of us can learn a thing or two about men and marriage. I am definitely calling thunder on them 🙂

    But Biko as a side note, what sacrifice do I need to offer to get a physical copy of drunk?

    1. Getting all emotional and sorry for the guy only for him to waste it all by telling lies. Is he even a Chemical engineer? Did he even buy a Mercedes for the wife? Can he be trusted with all the prior information?
      He seriously needs help.

      1. I don’t know if I’m just broke and the mention of such huge amounts of money scares me but that’s where my doubts started…

    2. for me , i thought the relationships that lasted the longest are the ones where guys get married straight out of campus….. wueh… its sad…. really sad… there is no sure formula for ‘this things’.

      1. I can relate to this kind of lying, I once had a boyfriend, not so long ago,he could lie about anything and everything. At one point we worked in the same office and so we went to work one morning and he called in to say the sister was dead. Company arranged and gave out money and also some employees did. The day for burial came and some people went to their home in shags since they knew the place but not exact homestead. Long story short the sister was and still is alive.
        Anyway we broke up later. one day a lady called me to tell me I leave her hubby alone. It was the most toxic relationship I had and it has taken me so long to date again.
        If he lies about death he can as well kill you.

    3. …blowing smoke up my ass, feeding me grass.
      Now this part, how do just get some of these words…

  3. I am like what the fuck? Who does this? So he thought you don’t counter check your stories? This is a sick man, sick man sick man, He needs mental checkup, and be thrown in Kamiti for two years…

    1. personally i think this goes right under mental health and dissasociation and gradeour thinking . like for real i hear this is something narcassist do….. though in this case he has no signs of narcassism….. or does he?
      i remember in my M.A class ( criminology ) one class , the lecturer said ”someone people will marry a person thinking the person is normal .” , that sentence and the very pregnant , reverence of it stayed with me until i came across a book on borderline personality and other material on mental health disorders and marriages… and i realised…. its very important to date ‘woke’. woke to the signs of mental illnesses… borderline personality disorder, histrionic personality , bipolar , narcassistic personality disorder…. addictions in families that travel down.. and some addictions dont even involve taking meds or cannabis…. some addictions are to bad things being done to you like ‘trauma bonding’……
      this is something people should talk about . mental health , addictions and relationships

    1. So much pain in failure that he chose to create an alternate reality, where she was the villain and he was the vilified.

  4. I am not sure what is more annoying, that he would spin this tale wishing death to another or that for a moment, I questioned my life choices with his tales of his amassing wealth. Please tell me he lied about that too! – might be the only thing that will make me feel better about time wasted reading about this “lower than a douchebag” [an insult to all douchebags really – apologies to them].

    1. was like ,at 27 and the nigga owns two houses in Kiambu road,and as if that’s not enough the multi million biz,aaaiih!!
      kujipigia debe nayo.hii Kenya moja and kijana you own all that , nkt!.team chochment,thanks gaad it turns out the story was a big fat lie,coz some y’all started questioning what you doing with your life.Brathe !ustupandishe pressure bure

      1. That deal with the MP sounded too good to be true,. And it went down too smoothly. Which company liquidates that quickly though?

        1. 112m is roughly 6% of 3b. Why would the MP be so desperate of this 6% if he had managed to raise the 94%?

          What kind of project would be stalled by lack of 6% of it’s total budget?

          This is where I started doubting the story, but still felt I could be wrong.

    2. I coudnt understand how he managed to pay the mp in 2months then hve 700k onlynin his account. Where was the daughter when the wife was bringing men? When did he buy property in nanyuki?

  5. I think this guy is just thrilled with the series of events that happens here and wanted to just be apart of the revolution. Only his story isn’t a complete thrill, yet.
    You are forgiven!, go and not sin again mate.

  6. I could smell the lies from the beginning. 27 yr old. Drops out of work. Asks for 30 milli from a politician, makes sick money and the business thrives. Pregnant wife, job, baby, drinking.. that was just not adding up…

    That jamaa is deep in his distorted imagination…and he can’t help it.

    1. You and me both… plus who drinks like he claims she did and not only maintains a job but gets promoted in the process…

      Someone needs help methinks… a journey of acceptance and forgiveness is a good place to start.

    2. I’m so glad Biko did some background checks, because by the time i got to the third paragraph i was almost rushing to the comment section to say, “it is a lie”. Where was the child during all the drunken fights and visits by strange men who walked to dispensers? Which self respecting, street smart man or woman gives his 112m for a deal whose success is based on a political win? I wish i could attach a meme here.

      And since it seems a child does exist, how does the baby mama leave this twisted man with her child?

      1. Exactly my thoughts! When he moved to Nanyuki, I wondered how Biko did not ask where the kid was at the time ( I expected him to ask)

  7. I don’t usually comment but haiya!!!…. now the whole story (his multi million business) sounds fishy…he needs professional help.

  8. Hahahaha what the hell is wrong with some folks? That’s a psycho right there. Why would you murder your baby mama and waste Biko’s time? Biko be damn mad pole sana.

  9. First, I didn’t know it takes this much for you to put out these stories every Tuesday, mpaka involving the ‘agencies’! Mad respect Sir.
    Secondly, I had a feeling reading the part of he story, too scripted. I’m glad you called his bullshit, in fact I feel he should be investigated, he’s a psychopath that one. How he can spin a tale like that with a straight face, something must be wrong with him. Or maybe he just has a great imagination? Or could this have happened to someone, or a variation of it? This story would make a great movie.
    Now I’m thinking too many things I need to stop.

  10. Don’t judge a man so harshly, he was just a man trying to make his life matter in his own way. We mortals are extravagant in our weaknesses… i heard that somewhere. It applies to him in someway and to us all.

  11. Gosh! I thought it was fiction form the billions and millions………blah! blah! blah! but he had to kill his ‘wife’, ………………….i give up on humanity. He needs counselling. And the baby mama needs to report to DCI

    1. Irene, it is either we both watch a lot of movies or a lot of murder in the news be because I think that baby mama needs police protection. A man that sick can murder her for real

  12. Geez! One might imagine that yours – vocation, I mean – is a walk in the park! You know, not unlike like those who tell us why study about Vasco Da Gama! Such are the ones who tell folk whose calling is different from theirs that unless one studies an ‘important’ discipline and ends up as a tie-by-day kind of person, one’s, contribution to society is insignificant! Biko only tells stories after all, how hard can be, really? They might impugn! But goodness, some days you show up at the office alright and everything goes bonkers. It’s the same for everybody! So I appreciate the challenges and difficulties that occasionally attend your calling. However, this is a story, nonetheless! And well told. Surely to Biko, everything is a story!!! Thanks mate!

  13. Cock and bull should have made a better title given the run around this fucker took youthrough. That is a pyscho that needs checking given the recent spate of killings within the homestead I would not be surprised if this chap acted out on his perverted dream of seeing his baby mama dead. He needs help and his family a restraining order.

  14. If you meet me to try and feed me wild fiction you are not only disrespecting my work, you are disrespecting yourself and guys who come here to read that story.

    And here I was just feeling sorry for him and demonizing the lady…
    Total Disrespect…Nkt!!

  15. Yaani you kosana with your baby momma then you decide you’ll just spin a story about her death like this. Really twisted! Was he even earning mad cash as he claims ?

  16. It’s funny how Biko still winged the story impeccably, giving us vivid descriptions, winning our hearts and minds yet he knew most of it was a lie !

  17. You Sir, have employed a .Sherlokian’ method magnificently. Noted the impossiblities and whatever you were left with, however improbable, was proven true.

  18. What the goddamn fuck?

    This is some new level sociopathic behavior on this man. I find myself doubtful of even the MP story, but that’s irrelevant. Of importance is if the daughter is safe and sound. And far away from him too.

    1. I was angry at the point he said cyanide cost 200k…that thing is free of charge..you only need to eat dried cassava peelings..

      And this guy has some mental issue. He should be booked at Mathare Mental hospital and be sleeping right across at the cells of Muthaiga police station. And perhaps a beating, five strokes of the cane, hot ones, every Tuesday afternoon for the next five weeks.

  19. That story was alarmingly juicy from the start. Great that
    you “try to make sure that people don’t come posing as their alter-ego, blowing smoke up your ass, feeding you grass….”

  20. The MP also wanted 51% shares in his company until he repaid the 30m after which they would go 50-50 shareholding. This is where the lies began.

    1. Kwanza the 1% in the 51% stake deal spoils it all. Like after paying 30 million you now get relieved off the 1% and become equal partners in the 50-50 deal. And who conducts business in such a silly way? Close a 100 million plus business for imaginary earnings. Then this wife who’s jobless then suddenly rich and rich. That idiot doesn’t value money. With 700,000 with a good brain you should stay afloat very comfortably unless you are drinking high end prostitutes. People don’t know how to lie. I’m super angry at it all. What a wasted Tuesday.

    1. I agree. This lie has exposed a lot of truth that we need to hear. Maybe Biko should find a way to reach out to the lady. Congratulations to Biko for seeing the LIE in the story the man wanted us to beLIEve. No matter how interwoven, the truth always looks different.

  21. Is any of it true? The crazy money, the politician, the business? Is the whole story a fabrication? Dude has serious issues!

  22. My first red flag was that he had 2 houses on Kiambu Road by the age of 27. Then he repaid 30 mil plus interest in 6 months. These get-rich-quick storos always make me suspicious. Sijui, maybe I am just broke or I beleive in due process too much. Also, I was waiting for you to actually mention the wash-wash business he does but yes, that man should respect himself. That was totally unnecessary.

  23. Mental illness is real. Alafu people say ati psychpaths are white only. Ladies and Gentleman please find our very own psycho.

  24. Damn, had even imagined how the wife’s family cried during the funeral not knowing she was such a demon.

    Why does the baby mama leaver her with the child? He clearly needs help.

  25. I almost dropped the story at the middle it was too dramatic and movie like.i just feel pity for the little girl.someone who can liar to unknown audience to that extend.. what about to those he knows may God have mercy on him.

  26. I always knew chocolate man is credible and honest. Really sad that some idiot wasted your precious time. A good learning point. Kaa rada kabisa. Corruption is everywhere!!!!

    1. “I have done interviews for close to close to ten years now, and often I can flag discrepancies in a story because the devil is in the details and most people don’t care for details even though that’s where the story is. Whilst I will confirm the basics by doing a rudimentary background check I can only do so much to corroborate your story. I realise that people can be prone to exaggeration and hyperbole and this is fine, but fundamentally you should respect the truth because it’s yours. If you meet me to try and feed me wild fiction you are not only disrespecting my work, you are disrespecting yourself and guys who come here to read that story. ”
      Shame on him.!..I can’t wait for part 2.I see women living in horror marriages&my heart sinks in wonder on how they keep up with mediocre.. buckle up..part 2 will come with twists,sighs&mixed emotions that will leave us breathless.I hope I’ll be inspired though..

    1. Impervious was greeeeeeaaat!!!!! It was just so awesome.I keep remebering the jokes in the middle of the night and I start laughing alone …haha
      We need another one!!
      Maybe about psychos and people who are living a lie…Yes? No? Maybe?

  27. People should put some Respek on Chocolate man’s forehead. Sorry I mean work.
    Also respect our emotions, as the gang. We were all feeling woiye for him kumbe anatubeba ufala. Please aache kutupima akili.

    Anyway, good FBI work Biko. Keen eye and the devil is in the details and you really got a good eye.

  28. That guy quickly needs mental assessment. He seems to be having grandiose delusions. Mental illness is real.

  29. WOW its funny as i was reading this story i kept on wondering is this really real. can someone be so wicked. can a mother willingly expose her child to all this violence and random men walking in and out of the house.A financially stable woman at that. only to realize its Bull. its true. i feel so disrespected as a wife and mother.many of the stories in this series have painted women in such a bad light that some of us are trying to do better by our men as we listen to these men speak their truth and this one was just contributing to the narrative without it even being true. aaaargh!..

  30. The way some (not all) men lie,

    am beginning to think that Adam did feed Eve the apple and changed the story…

    True Biko this is so much insult to our time, intelligence, your work and to the men fraternity

  31. I felt my heart sink lower when I got to the twist of the story. The fact I the reader in me had been sunk in sympathy for this lad and then find out his lower-than-douchebag just crafted a piece of mediocre lie sprinkled with bits of reality is really disheartening.

    Brave son of Africa, just where is did you dump your manners??

    PS: It is really important to respect time and people. #lifehacks101

  32. Biko Biko Biko,
    You ooze wisdom in your closing remarks.
    My red flags started rising over the money figures and lack of security in their business commitments. As a man, I would never wish to see him as anyone’s husband or father! He needs redemption from own slavery

  33. That is a man who is a son to a mother somewhere. you make a petition prayer for him that on day he would go to sleep and some one does some brain surgery alignment and that he would bounce back to reality . Lord help him to help himself.

  34. “If we can’t be honest with ourselves as men, then how can we be honest to women?”
    Am a strong believer in being honest with on self.
    The man needs help, that was properly his way of asking for help.

  35. This kind of hate is strong wueeh!! “He even went to Eastleigh to find cyanide but he was told it was 200k which he didn’t have.” I can decide whether to be shocked or worried there is this kind of hate.

  36. Am i the only one fearing for the safety of Lady X and her daughter. This kind of elaborate lying comes of as psychotic.
    I have had an experience with a pathological liar(usually displayed by people with obsessive tendencies), so this is possible. God help us.

    1. I sensed lies where he said the loan repayment was 7M a month on 30M investiment. No business (legit) can give you that kind of return. And it actually went well with no qualms and 30M was repaid as planned. Nah…ask people who have been in business.

      I hope the cyanide mention does not give some psychos ideas.

      1. When I saw the loan amount and the returns expected I thought the story would turn to how the business got difficcult and it was impossible to pay so he was arrested bla bla.

  37. I think that dude should contemplate writing one of those psycho thrillers and stop blowing smoke up our collective asses. His imagination is sure wild enough. Or maybe it’s just me looking at the positive side of things because the alternative is way too sad to contemplate.

  38. Biko did you ask him whether he has ever wanted to be an actor? Does he read James Hadley Chase?
    On the other hand being broke does make one feel small, maybe he says “When I grow up I want to be filthy rich and use bank notes as tissue paper!” And then he fed you his fantasies.

    1. I believed this story fully.. When Biko started revealing the truth I was like what did I miss. I had to scroll back.
      What makes a man stoop so low?

  39. When things go wrong,i think It’s so easy to play victim,and make the other person a devil. That guy is scared,completely scared of coming to terms with the truth and the reality that he has messed up,and has a huge role to play with where he is in life right now.
    I hope he gets straight with himself.

  40. I was reading this at the edge of my seat, stopped midway to tell my colleague to hurry up and read it to them bam!!!!! he has a good imagination ,the lies wah!!

  41. pwahahaha…I have laughed until I cried.
    What this guy has done is to take a few stories from this series, and embellish them to his liking; the making and losing of money, involvement of high-profile individuals ie politicians, the fighting and cheating etc. Makes him sound a wee bit juvenile.
    He would do good to channel his imagination into something useful though.

    On a serious note, it would be good to give the mother of his child a head’s up, that the father of her child fantasizes about her death. She should be careful around him especially if they are co-parenting. He shouldn’t be trusted around the child, she should go to court for sole custody of their daughter.

  42. Mad respect to you chocolate man! So you go through all the rigor to give us our weekly Tuesday dose.

  43. This is some sociopath; a narcissist too. He sounds like my ex husband who walks around telling all and sundry made up stories about me, the woman he psychologically/emotionally and physically abused for 6 years.

  44. Calling yourself out on your own bullshit and acting on it has to be the hardest yet necessary thing ever! Why do people lie so shamelessly? I can’t stand serial liars.

  45. I lost it at Cyanide! Cyanide! Seriously?! Pole you had to go through a complete waste of time… The beginning of this story is to word for wordy, unlike Bikozulu at all. I was waiting for the introduction to the guest writer… Sasa naelewa. No wonder! Why waste creativity on this pilgarlic!

    Forward we must go. No?

  46. Biko, this is great work as usual.
    But I learnt from the War of Roses that every obnoxious act is a cry for help.
    This whackjob needs help.

  47. That child should not spend time with him unsupervised. He is unstable. His desire to see X dead should be taken seriously too.

  48. Thats a psychopath.. the woman or baby mama should run before she is harmed… A narcissist to the core!!!! Some humans are just unbelievable

  49. As always, great writing Biko.
    That dude is psycho! Cyanide????
    But, from the abundance of the heart, so the mouth speaketh. This could be his plan…

  50. I had my doubts when he paid 30M + interest in 6 months. Maybe it’s me looking at the world through poverty-tinted lenses. What a waste of resources and emotions! More importantly does he have sole custody of their daughter? I hope not, because he will most likely share these made up stories with her. Poor child!!

  51. My spidey senses were pricked when he talked about his seriously physically and emotionally abusive relationship cause I wondered ” why did’t he just leave?” But I figured, who am I with my single unmarried self to comment on anyone’s marriage/reasons for staying. Moral of the story- trust your spidey senses.

  52. And to think that at some point i was abit envious of his employees who work half-day on fridays… What a waste!

  53. I’m not disputing that 27 year olds can make that kind of crazy money but his story seemed to have holes from the very beginning. It seemed like a fairy tale that had gone sour. Now we know it was all in his head. The guy might need help, he’s probably suffering from hallucinations or some other mental illness.

  54. I would actually not have been surprised if it was a true story.. You think you have seen, heard and read it all then boom, another one..

  55. Whoa. This is intense and beyond psychotic. How does one move from having a baby with their significant other to visualizing their death? The baby momma should feature on Women and Marriage. I would love to read her story.

  56. If you meet me to try and feed me wild fiction you are not only disrespecting my work, you are disrespecting yourself and guys who come here to read that story.


  57. Hi Biko,
    How shallow of him to think he can lead you up the garden path lying through his teeth.
    I appreciate your artistry and the great and the great lengths you take to ensure authenticity.

  58. Hahahahahahahahaha, I know the bugger. At least this proves that he is the insane one and not the victim as he makes it out to be.

  59. That guy should start writing novels. That was an interesting story. He was looking for a publisher in you Biko.

  60. Well well that was unexpected. What did he expect from lying?pity? I didn’t feel pity for him. i just questioned his masculinity. Shameon him for wasting your time and ours too. I can’t wait for women and marriage. whoop whoop.

  61. The story didn’t make much sense from the beginning i.e. giving out kes 112 mn to a politician and closing down your company, to receiving a phone call that the wife is dead just as he had envisioned. I started doubting the story even before Biko mentioned it.The guys is however mentally sick.

  62. I think I know this con Lawrence. He was smooth like that while in college. Lost touch though. Na most importantly to note ametuharibia sisi honest chemical engineers jina. He should not have used the daughter like that.

  63. Meeeeenn!! This is crazy!
    Reminds me of one time long long ago. So I was in a new town doing some research and we ran into this guy who claimed he knew my colleague. We hang out together and he starts giving us this story of how he lost his entire family in an accident. He starts to cry mentioning the names of his kids. Poor thing. My colleague says that she knew the story but they had never met in person. Later the idiot disappears with our phones, kumbe his intention all along was to steal from us. That psychopath used someone’s story for people to pity him.
    This world is full of crazies I tell you.

  64. What the heck!! Sounds like a serious psycho to me. And his story sounded like bollocks from the start. I’m glad you saw through him Biko. A reason why the ladies keep saying men are trash…a trash indeed.

  65. Hahahahahaha….only in Kenya!!!! We lie to make the story suit our feelings. But anyway we all lie so i can’t judge him!

  66. I wish this story would be the close to Men and Marriage. If it has come to spinning tales of this kind, we need a break.


  67. I was getting stressed for him but he has left me with more questions! It’s uncouth to say the least.

  68. I rarely got a whiff of what was going on in my econ class but the numbers didn’t add up, but who am I to question the top 40 under 40… turns out it’s some attention-seeking psycho with a heck of an imagination

  69. Dear Biko,
    I am so awed by your ethics and respect for your work from this post.
    I more than ever respect your hustle. Before I thought you were a great writer, but you’ve proven to be such a template for good journalism.
    So proud of you, and encouraged at the same time to uphold integrity.

  70. I had had enough, I wanted to save what was left of my manhood. There was shouting. I hit this man with a wheel spanner. He drew a gun on me, in my house! Anyway, I got his car’s number plate and searched for him, got his name. He’s one of your media guys.”

    This bit gave it away.

  71. I like the “twists and reverse”…Good one…Dude learnt how to lie from liars…I Wish the Daughter nothing but the best and good heart!

  72. Man was I sad for not working in his “company” friday half days? That salary scale? Haaaiii I need my feelings back!!!

  73. I knew this story was B*$%€ when he said that when he was called concerning her wife’s death that he told the caller to call the contacts on the windshield.
    First and foremost
    An accident that has killed, how can the windscreen be intact?
    Secondly who puts emergency contacts on the windscreen , are you a rally driver?
    Biko just @ at this guy we deal with him.

  74. For real, I read this story, re-read it again and failed to even have a nugget for the comment section.God forgive him!!

  75. Waaahhh! Why would anyone twist a story like that? Oh my!!! Thank God for your strong sense of discernment Biko, which is why its always important to find out the other side of the story. As human beings its natural that we would want to paint ourselves as the angels when a relationship comes to an end but the truth is that it takes 2 people for a relationship to fail, both parties are always to blame.

    So please bring the ex-wives of all the men you interviewed. Lt’s hear their side of the story. I’m already looking forward to the women and marriage series

  76. Me I am grateful this story is a lie – I don’t want to live in a world where people make 30 million a month.

  77. This dude narration of his story didn’t add up from the start. Was he in Quail business or Pyramid schemes? That ROI is too high my friend. Then the story coincidised with nabbing of fake Gold traders, i couldnt help but think he was one of them.
    But Salvaging his last kick of manhood with such a lie is too nuts. Biko you put him where he belongs.

  78. I think I am smart..Lol.. I detected the first lie when he said that after he repaid the 30M loan, they had to Co own the company at 50/50. Plus the story of his daughter was not adding up…The daughter could have featured greatly in the story considering how bad the situation was. I kept reading hoping to see where Biko would ask him how the daughter copes in such a house.
    He is just another psycho like Kinuthia. Men of nowadays expect to date ladies who are waayyy ahead of them in everything nowonder we are experiencing so many murders. Maybe this Lady X had made it in life and the guy felt intimidated. I think even all the business stuff plus cars and houses at just 27 are all lies.
    You are such an amazing writer Biko.

  79. It was a bit fictional from the beginning, the 30 million 112 mic 700K….. I was thinking, what is wrong with my life and my circles. It was too smooth to be true. Thank you for protecting us. A week is never complete without Biko.

  80. Yaani, my heart goes out to that child aki. How can somebody soo sick be allowed to spend time alone with a child. Doesn’t matter if he fathered her or wareva. He is very sick….and should not be allowed to be around a child, unsupervised. May the Lord protect both mother and daughter aki.

  81. Hurt people will hurt people. Don’t internalize their actions, and heal from the hurt experienced.

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  83. “Fundamentally, we are all flawed as men. We come with great baggage and limitations, but eventually we have to strive to be better human beings by willing to not only see our flaws in other men but also try and correct them but also learn from them. If we can’t be honest with ourselves as men, then how can we be honest to women?” – – This is just it, masterpiece.

  84. Well…Biko to start with pole.It is difficult no frustrating to go into a story only for it to turn into a “Wild Goose Chase”.The strength and the mental capacity employed into these is so enormous and enslaving that all one needs is honesty and appreciation but as it can turn out to be at times…a story is never said until the turn is twisted.

  85. I had been feeling some type of way for him until he said ‘…the help…’ , I am so glad you called out this pathological liar.
    I sure do hope that baby girl is safe with that man.

  86. Lets cut the guy some slack, I think he coud be some of those egocentric glory hunters who would be very happy to see the whole lot ofus reading and commenting after he’s thrown us into a tailspin.

  87. He always wished his “wife” would crash and die and then it actually happens?? I had to pause at that point.

  88. Mhh I started to doubt this saga when the 112 million part came into play. No self respecting kikuyu would part with 112 million even if you promised him the moon. Its a lie……..

  89. Wow! This guy needs professional help; something’s off with him and I feel like this is his ‘cry’ for help. He might have gone around it the wrong way, but he does need help.

  90. I felt like I was reading a certain John Grisham book again I mean was the guy running a cartel kwani… eiiy

  91. First red flag. Who bets a company on a politician. Some of us are normally here for the word play, sentence construction …. no matter the Story. Maybe the guy should enroll for fiction writing masterclass. haha.

  92. He had 700k in his bank ccount plus property in nanyuki but shortly after he had to sell a house and a car to stay afloat. . doesn’t make economic sense.

  93. It’s either the guy is a very creative liar or Biko knew how to bring out the story. I liked the first part of this until when the rants about the lies started. Ofcourse the writer has the responsibility of feeding the audience with genuine stories. However, what transpires in the background should be like a “black box” to the audience. The audience don’t really want to know about who lied and who didn’t. The writing team should take this as a necessity to conduct background checks and filter out stories so that the audience can be fed with realistic stories.

  94. For me, success is changing the social culture of my world, teaching people how to look at the world differently and to shun the negative practices as opposed to glorifying them. This can be done better by going through the education way feeding my passion, educating myself on social thinking patterns and approaches that resonate with the masses, hence effectively positioning myself to influence change. For me, this is the most important aspect of education, one driven by passion as opposed to the hopes of a stable life.